DAY 24

Edward 2 has come back. I don't know how to feel. He makes me cry sometimes, especially when he smacks me.


He says he has good news.

.

DAY 21

Hamish is gone. Edward 2 is gone. I can only writhe, helpless and alone, enveloped in my despair.


So hungry. Haven't eaten since Edward 2 left.


I didn't know where to find food. Only one place...


I found some baked beans.


Shame is no longer a word I recognise.

DAY 15

Hamish is gone. I asked Edward 2 if he knows where Hamish might have gone, but he said he doesn't know.

I am worried. I hope he comes back soon.

DAY 14

Today I was asked to leave my job. I felt sad. My boss said that coming to work with faeces on my clothes is not acceptable.

Edward 2 says that they are bad people for taking away my work and they must be forced to pay for their treachery and sedition.

But Hamish says that it was justified and I must learn to accept the setbacks of life. I think I agree with Hamish this time.


Edward 2 was not very happy.

DAY 9

The days are longer.

Sometimes I look out of the window at the pigeons outside. They are my friends. I throw them food, because I am frightened that they will fly away and leave me for ever. Edward 2 is jealous of them.

Edward 2 keeps telling me to drink wine and vodka - he says they taste better mixed together as well. I don't want to do it, but he says he will leave me if I don't. He mustn't leave. I can't be alone again.

Hamish keeps saying Edward 2 is trying to force me to do things. Hamish is a good friend, but Edward 2 promises that he has only my best interests at heart.


I believe him.

DAY ?

Everything's fine now. It's OK. I'm OK. The mystery person was just a new friend of mine. His name is Edward 2.


He's a good friend. He's better than the ones who left here. Why did they leave me? Friends don't leave.

Edward 2 will never leave. He says he will stay for ever.

He can drink a whole bottle of wine in under 7 minutes.

I love him.

DAY 6

There is someone else in this apartment with me. I know it. I can sense it.

I decided to set a test. I put this block of wood in the middle of the floor last night, to prove it.


Look! In the morning, it had moved! I'm telling you! LOOK AT THE BLOCK OF WOOD!


They're trying to make me snap. I won't give in. I'm stronger than they are. You won't make me snap. Do you hear me? You will NOT make me snap! Do you hear me?!

DAY 5

I was feeling down today, so I watched my favourite film, Love Actually, while crying and masturbating until I fell asleep.

I wandered up and down the halls for a while, shouting out occasionally. There might be someone who answers. You never know.

I gave up after a while.


Time for a drink.

DAY 4

I cleaned the apartment today. It was filthy, all caked in grime and dust. It felt satisfying. Pure. I wiped the surfaces down a couple of dozen times, just to be thorough.

Received another Christmas card. I almost cried with happiness.

I don't know what to do with myself, really. Nobody to talk to. No-one in the flat. No-one in the halls. I decided to chat to Hamish, my toy seal. I made him reply, too. He can be funny sometimes, especially when he tells jokes.

Maybe I'll watch a film or two.

DAY 3

Quick note; I could have sworn I heard a noise outside the flat. I went to investigate, but nobody was there.

Maybe I'm just a teensy bit nervous.

Reminder to self: should buy some more sherry tomorrow